The Bleak Fragment of a Lost Fighter
Poem **Trigger Warning : Themes of suicide and suicidal thoughts**
I spoke the language of sadness,
absentmindedly collecting anxieties
to scare people away
I brought vengeance everywhere
as if they were my lucky charm
I promised all I wished for was justice and for you to stay,
but too many things have pushed me over the edge
Since fears were all I had for breakfast
I cooked worries as the main dish for lunch
while nightmares fulfilled my hunger at midnight
and guilt would always satisfy my thirst at dawn
I felt incredibly sick and got extremely frightened
I wanted to throw up due to the rotten smell of uneasiness
I vomited everything I consumed — and I thought I’d feel better, yet I lost consciousness
I hoped that I could let go of half of my burdens and taste a little freedom before I got broken beyond repair
So blatant yet so serene
is a hoarse whisper of the evergreen,
trembling in a mortified scene,
they framed me for being the evil queen
How can I be heard and seen without wringing out the lungs or shedding withered red petals?
The melodic, soothing wrath
of my soundless breath
sugarcoats this appealing voice of the death
I am more than willing to go after my destined path
Now, would you crown my head with a laurel wreath?
Please stop cursing, and you should emit resentment no more
I am trying to save myself from the agonizing sore
instilled by the world within my core
I set myself free to soar across the oceanic sky —
free from this unwavering hellish shore
Heavens know I have fought my best —
they must have taken note of how the blazing fire in my spirit
has turned into everlasting folklore
